don't worry so much

Oh god I drew a sad. Because I will always be mad about Siri Tachi's death and I will always be mad about her not being in Clone Wars and I will always be especially mad about Satine because wtf.

She touched his cheek, and her hand fell. "Don't worry so much," she said.
Her eyes closed, and she was gone.

- Secrets of the Jedi, Jude Watson

Like excuse me, of all the deaths in the extended Star Wars universe, not a single other one hit me as hard as this one. Let me tell you why. Obi-Wan and Siri were friends all through their teenage years, ever since Obi-Wan returned to the Order after briefly leaving it for a "good cause" he got caught up in during a mission. She was disappointed in his "lack of commitment" and let him know it, and he worked hard to re-earn her approval. When they were in their last years of being Padawans together, they discovered that they felt something other than friendship for each other, but before the relationship could really go anywhere, Yoda and Qui-Gon reminded Obi-Wan of the Jedi Code and their stance on attachment. He and Siri agreed, painfully but resolutely, to think of each other as nothing more than comrades from that point forward. And they did so for many years, eventually going on missions together again and never reminding each other what they could have had. Even when Siri pretended to leave the Order to go undercover and take down a pirate gang, Obi-Wan kept a lid on his feelings. Their Padawans, Anakin and Ferus Olin, never got along well but knew their Masters shared a deep bond, the nature of which was not completely clear.

And then, during the Clone Wars, Siri was killed by a combination of blasterfire and a shuttle crash while taking down a bounty hunter. Obi-Wan, having come perilously close to the dark side as he stood over her killer, later reflects that while he mourns her loss deeply, he would never have been able to cope with losing her had the Jedi not forced them to separate all those years earlier, forced him to learn how to let her go.

You see why I'm upset.

Sads aside, I am chugging through Dragon Age: Origins and have the humans and elves on my side now, which I think means I'm... halfway through the game? It's a long game. But I love it.

- KP


Quote of the Day: *looking at the Urn of Sacred Ashes* "Nice vase. I should get one for my house."